As a mom it is so easy to play the compare game. Whether you are comparing yourself to another mom or comparing what they have to what you have or even comparing what their kids are like to what your kids do, we all compare. As a mom to a medical fragile child this game is intensified more than I ever thought it would be.
I spent so much time when Jaxon first got diagnosed comparing what other kids got to do that Jax didn't. I spent WAY to much time worrying about the life that Jax was being robbed of. I was constantly worrying about the places he wouldn't get to go, the things he wouldn't be able to learn or the friends he would never make.
One day, I heard God whisper into my heart that He made Jaxon exactly who He intended him to be. He created him fully knowing every memory we would make with him and every persons life He would use Jax to touch. God didnt create Jax to ride a bike or to go to school or to be a singer, athlete or preacher. God intentionally created my son to be a Kingdom builder, a heart healer and a real earth angel. Some one who teaches daily without speaking a word. Some one who heals wounds you never even knew were there. Someone who looks into your eyes and challenges you to see yourself as he sees you, perfect and beautiful just as you are.
I am embarrassed to admit that before this thought was put on my heart by God I wasted too much time worrying about this version of my child I thought Jaxon was supposed to be but in all honesty who Jax is, is better than I could have ever dreamed of. I made a conscious choice from that day forward to not spend my time grieving the life that Jax wouldn't get to live and instead celebrate the life he is living now.
We have choices to make every day. Whether we compare ourselves to another mom, to our own mother or to a complete stranger or maybe your closest friend, we all choose to compare. But I challenge you to make the choice to celebrate the life YOU live, the children YOU have and the hurt YOU are in the midst of, as painful as it may be.
God has created you to be exactly who you are supposed to be. As much as you may covet other peoples things or their life, everything that is meant for you will happen in the perfect timing. Trust that who you are is such a beautiful picture of the love our Father has for us and wake up everyday cherishing this life He has given you. None of us are perfect and we are ALL a work in progress. As long as you try everyday to be better than you were yesterday you are becoming exactly who you are supposed to be and who God intends for you to be. I want to truly grab hold of the best life God has for me + not spend wasted time worrying about things that God has not called for my life or for my sons life.
Thanks for stopping by!
xoxo, Tori.
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